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Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, there are better alternative ways of reducing crimes. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative #crimes
For a long time ,
prison
 sentences were a controversial topic.A vast majority of
people
afirm
Correct your spelling
affirm
a firm
 that longer
prison
 sentences
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 proportionally correlated to the minimisation of
crime
, others are of the option that there are different alternatives to
this
 problem. Extended
prison
 punishment has several benefits.
This
 decision would make
people
 think twice before committing any type of
crime
.
As a
result
Add a comma
,result
show examples
this
 would reduce essentially the number of prisoners.
However
, extending the
prison
 sentence is not effective from the
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 point of view because the number of prisoners will escalate and jails will be forced to be reconstructed to get additional space and to employ more staff for the security of the prisoners.
As a
consequence
Add a comma
,consequence
show examples
 the state will have to invest extra funds into
this
 particular sphere that does not bring back any profits.
On the other
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 some
people
 argue that it is more beneficial to apply different methods to reduce
crime
.
Firstly
 , if a country has jobs
where
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 citizens could apply
and
Change preposition
for and
show examples
 make a decent living
out of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, the number of criminals will be reduced.
Consequently
, funds that would have been used for the construction of jails will now be used for
economical
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 development and
people
 will have a better living.A substantial root of
crime
 is selfishness and greed.
This
 can be extracted from our society by teaching young children the right way of living.The change would result
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 a different society that lives greater and has a decreased
crime
 rate. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
 it is true that both views have their own unique advantages and disadvantages.
Submitted by acaitaz on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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