Some people think that teenage years are the happiest times of most people's live. Others think that adult life brings more happiness in spite of greater responsibilities. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Although
people
believe that happy moments in life are mostly enjoyed as teenagers, some suggest that
besides
more liabilities, adulthood comes with the happiest time. In my opinion, I consider that young age life brings more joyful moments since there are no or fewer liabilities. On the one hand, some
people
think that teenagers have happy times and I agree.
In other words
, young age is a learning phase and mistakes can be tolerated since there is room for correction.
For instance
, if they beat one another, they will not get arrested but maybe get counselling.
Furthermore
, young
people
can have whatever they want, they just ask for a toy and the parents will try to make them happy
ending
Wrong verb form
and end
show examples
up buying for them.
For example
, if they want a bicycle asking for it is what they do and they get one.
On the other hand
, it is believed that adult age comes with greater happiness because they have freedom of choice they can make decisions of their own liking.
Thus
they can choose to eat out at a restaurant they just do it without consulting anyone. Another reason why adulthood has the most exciting phase is,
mistakes
Correct word choice
that mistakes
show examples
occur
however
if they happen it is a lesson learnt but as mature ,
people
they will try to manage and minimize mistakes before they happen. In conclusion,
people
vary in their opinions,
however
, I think that teenagers moments have much more
happy
Correct word choice
happier
show examples
times because it is a learning phase and no need to work to get what they want.
Submitted by fideliscity on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph follows a clear and logical structure, with a topic sentence and supporting details.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are important components of the essay, ensure to include them and make them clear and relevant to the topic.
task achievement
Provide detailed and relevant examples to support your ideas and ensure they are closely linked to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: