Some think that the government should support retired people financially while others believe they should take care of themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In modern society, some people believe that the

government

Use synonyms

should financially

support

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the retired, ageing population

while

Linking Words

others think they should be able to be financially independent. I believe that the

government

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should definitely

support

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retired workers, especially the ones who have had a larger impact on the country’s well-being. There is no denying that most people have a rough idea

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when they would like to retire so planning in advance and having the ability to save money for their future is a big reason why the

government

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shouldn’t pay.

Therefore

Linking Words

, it would make sense for the

government

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to refuse financial

support

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this

Linking Words

case.

However

Linking Words

, many jobs on minimum wage, especially the

one’s

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ones

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directly involved with the

government

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, do not make enough money to save for retirement.

As a result

Linking Words

, they would need extra

support

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financially.

Now to

Rephrase

That is

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why the

government

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should pay, there are multiple reasons. One of them

being

Wrong verb form

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that many individuals pay taxes and have jobs that they can only sustain during their younger years.

For example

Linking Words

, soldiers working in the army retire younger and find themselves jobless after retirement.

Not to mention

Linking Words

how much they sacrifice for their country, only to be left with nothing as soon as they finish their service. As far as taxes are concerned, most of the money that the public

spend

Correct subject-verb agreement

spends

show examples

, many of them never see the impact it has on the country. In conclusion, the

government

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should aim to implement schemes that give back to some of the most valuable members of our society. Without them, the country would struggle to function effectively. To give them nothing in return is a disgrace to the

government

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uzi99Sun Jul 16 2023

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task response

Address the opposing views more explicitly and provide a clearer opinion.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to express ideas more precisely.

grammatical range

Work on sentence structure and grammatical accuracy to avoid errors and improve clarity.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

277 words

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In a public-funded healthcare system, people who are willing to pay for the best and fast treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers , are leaving their own poor countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. to what extent do you agree or disagree ?