It is suggested that all young adults should undertake a period of unpaid work, helping people in the community.
In
this
day and age, there are some people who belive
that the youths should be obliged to provide aid to people in the community for a short-term period, albeit free of income. Correct your spelling
believe
This
arrangement,
would seemingly disadvantage in certain aspects, actually possesses many merits that, in my opinion, would overshadow the drawbacks.
Regarding the Remove the comma
apply
drawbacks
if Add a comma
,drawbacks
such
as
schemes come to fruition, some young people would not Correct word choice
apply
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
willingly
Change the word
willing
do
because they feel their Fix the infinitive
to do
time
is being wasted, also
struggle to balance work Correct word choice
and also
time
and volunteer time
. To the ones who have families, this
would pose a dramatic influence on their financial aspects. Since they are compelled to perform community services would subject them to a loss of income, meanwhile, they will have no money to support their families, as well as
paying
their living expenses.
In spite of the above arguments, I am inclined to think the pros outweigh the cons. First and foremost, those Wrong verb form
pay
activities
would help the youths to build empathy and compassion as the
result of donating Correct article usage
a
time
and helping others. Undoubtedly, by helping the elderly, the sick, and the disabled or joining the charity activities
like raising funds, young adults will certainly obtain and accumulate first-hand value experience, and know more about society. Furthermore
, those who are eager to help others are civic-minded and develop social skills, consequently
, they will find it easy to form new relationships.
In a nutshell, I stand by my belief that the merits of suggesting the youths serve others in the community eclipse its demerits. This sort
of Fix the agreement mistake
These sorts
activities
should be widely-propagated
as voluntary Correct your spelling
widely propagated
activities
not mandatory.Submitted by anhthu3826
on
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