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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Dieting can change a person's life for the better or ruin's one's health completely. What's your opinion?

#change #person #life #ruin #health
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It is an undeniable fact that
prevalence
Correct article usage
the prevalence
show examples
 of
obesity
Use synonyms
 is gradually rising, causing not only many health problems but
also
Linking Words
 being in charge of a huge expenditure
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 health systems.
Consequently
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, the question arises whether dieting is a successful approach, or causes even severe
compliactions
Correct your spelling
complications
.
This
Linking Words
 will be discussed in the following paragraphs. What first comes to your mind when thinking about a solution for
obesity
Use synonyms
, is performing sports or restricting food supply. Relying on a nutrition schedule represents a personal plan
how
Change preposition
for how
show examples
 to lose
weight
Use synonyms
, and
subsequently
Linking Words
 gives you the feeling of having your fate in your own hands. Benefiting from
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
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 emotions you gain
while
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 getting closer to your desired
weight
Use synonyms
 might be an unprecedented game changer.
Moreover
Linking Words
, consuming healthier food will affect the whole body in a positive way like decreasing blood pressure,
for example
Linking Words
.
On the other hand
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,
negative
Correct article usage
the negative
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 consequences of dieting are well-known in the scientific world, resulting in inevitable repercussions.
Firstly
Linking Words
, sticking to a stiff eating plan minimizes life’s joy and quality, and
therefore
Linking Words
 harms personal well-being and psychological stability simultaneously. Always having an eye on your diet plan will
subsequently
Linking Words
 remind you of your
obesity
Use synonyms
 problem every single moment.
This
Linking Words
 might cause
depressions
Fix the agreement mistake
depression
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 and even the end of one’s ambition to lose
weight
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, studies reveal that after dieting the body will try to use any
calorie
Fix the agreement mistake
calories
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 to gain
weight
Use synonyms
 again so the person would probably end up with a higher
weight
Use synonyms
 than before, known as the „
jojo
Change the capitalization
Jojo
show examples
 effect“.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a never-ending circle of
loosing
Correct your spelling
losing
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 and gaining
weight
Use synonyms
 might eventually lead to an eating disorder.
In addition
Linking Words
, some diets consist of an inadequate supply of nutrition, having a negative impact
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the immune system, and causing
further
Linking Words
 problems.
Overall
Linking Words
,
obesity
Use synonyms
 is one of the most severe
issue
Change to a plural noun
issues
show examples
 in modern times
especially
Add the comma(s)
,especially
show examples
 in the industrial world, and it is unclear whether dieting will help or not. In my opinion, punishing yourself
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
 not eating the food you enjoy is not an appropriate solution and could even result in devastating consequences.
Submitted by i.reichwaldt on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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