IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam'. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

#car #ownership #thirty #years #cities #world #traffic #jam #measures #governments #people #cars
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It is
fact
Correct article usage
a fact
show examples
 that
due to
Linking Words
 the increasing
owenrship
Correct your spelling
ownership
 of cars rapidly and having more than one car in a family, many
cities
Use synonyms
 are facing the problem of
traffic
Use synonyms
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
. There are several
reaspns
Correct your spelling
reasons
 for
such
Linking Words
 a
sitution
Correct your spelling
situation
, and
also
Linking Words
 a few visible influences too. Both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
aspects are explained in the following paragraphs Discussing the reasons, the most common one is having the bad conditions of public transport in the
cities
Use synonyms
 that force them to think about buying
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 car.
This
Linking Words
 is because many
cities
Use synonyms
 still have the
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
busses
Correct your spelling
buses
show examples
 available
that
Correct word choice
and
show examples
passagers
Correct your spelling
passengers
 have to wait in some cases more
that
Correct word choice
than
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 hour if they miss a
buss
Fix the agreement mistake
bus
show examples
. A good example
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
Linking Words
 is Collingwood. People can travel fast than buss on cycle. It is
also
Linking Words
 true that they prefer getting new
owenrship
Correct your spelling
ownership
 of
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
 that cause
big
Add an article
a big
show examples
traffic
Use synonyms
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
 in
cities
Use synonyms
. The mentioned reasons have some solutions too. The foremost reason is seen on
this
Linking Words
traffic
Use synonyms
 problem is providing more busses and making
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 railway track that can
incurge
Correct your spelling
encourage
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers to choose
the
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apply
show examples
pulic
Correct your spelling
public
 transport over private
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, making new
opportunites
Correct your spelling
opportunities
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 jobs near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the resedenational area
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
would
decrase
Correct your spelling
decrease
 the need
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 travel. Adding to
this
Linking Words
, shopping centres can
also
Linking Words
 be built near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the living areas.
To conclude
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 and
voical
Correct your spelling
voice
voiced
 my opinion, I would say that focusing on the need that
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
 people
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
travel
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 from far away from their homes is the most ideal way to deal with
this
Linking Words
situtaion
Correct your spelling
situation
. In
big
Add an article
the big
show examples
 picture,
this
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 would
helps
Change the verb form
help
show examples
 to
decarse
Correct your spelling
decrease
 the need to buy new cars that will
pervent
Correct your spelling
prevent
 from
traffic
Use synonyms
 jams.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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