The charts below show the number of people in Europe who were affected by four types of noise by day and night in cities and rural areas in 2007.

#show #people #europe #four #noise #night #cities #areas

The given bar charts

presents

Change the verb form

present

show examples

data about

proportion

Add an article

the proportion

show examples

of Europeans

were

Correct pronoun usage

who were

show examples

influenced by the daily minimum and maximum levels of

noise

which originated from

traffic

, train, aircraft and

industry

both in

cities

and rural areas in 2007.

Overall

, it can be seen from the charts that

traffic

came out first in terms of

noise

levels in both

cities

and

countryside

Correct article usage

the countryside

show examples

while

the opposite was true for

industry

Correct article usage

the industry

show examples

section.

Firstly

traffic

was overwhelmingly the main source of

noise

during the day and

night

, which affected 64

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

and 48

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

citizens, respectively. Rural figures for

traffic

noise

were approximately half as high at 34

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

and 24

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

. Turning to

noise

from

train

Fix the agreement mistake

trains

show examples

, in

cities

, 10

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

and 8

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

individuals were impacted

while

,in urban areas, the figure

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

just true for 8

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

and 6

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

people. Noticeably, aircraft and

industry

categories seemed likely to have the least impact on the community. In terms of the categories in

cities

, only 4

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

and 1 million of the entire number of Europe residents were disturbed by flights during the day and at

night

, in turn, 2

millions

Change to singular

million

show examples

individuals

also

heard

aircrafts

Correct your spelling

aircraft

show examples

night

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

, with half of many aware of daytime flights. The figure for rural

industry

was

neglible

Correct your spelling

negligible

and in

cities

stood at 1 million ones influenced by time of day and

night

Submitted by anhthu3826 on Tue Jul 18 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words noise, traffic, industry, cities, night, millions with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 3 times.

▼

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

225 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The charts below show the number of people in Europe who were affected by four types of noise by day and night in cities and rural areas in 2007.

Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therfore caertain jobs are suitable for men and others women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is said that people’s life now is becoming more and more stressful. What are the causes and how to solve it?

Some people believe that anyone can create art such as painting, poetry, music and so on. Others think that a person should have special abilities to create art. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people believe that money for education should mainly be spent on better computers while others believe it would be better spent on teachers. Discuss both the view and give your own opinion.

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Other people think that, in today’s world, subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.