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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

One of the most widely discussed issues nowadays is various problems, such as polutions of air and water caused by the influence of the tourism industry.

One of the most widely discussed issues nowadays is various problems,
such
Linking Words
 as
polutions
Correct your spelling
pollution
pollutions
solutions
 of
air
Use synonyms
 and water caused by the influence of the
tourism
Use synonyms
 industry.
Thus
Linking Words
, people think that the state of each country ought to enact supplementary taxes on
air
Use synonyms
travels
Fix the agreement mistake
travel
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 and
accomodation
Correct your spelling
accommodation
 in order to limit today's
tourism
Use synonyms
 area. Personally, I
definetely
Correct your spelling
definitely
 disagree with
this
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 affirmation and believe that governments should find
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
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desicions
Correct your spelling
decisions
 to solve
this
Linking Words
 kind of
problems
Fix the agreement mistake
problem
show examples
. It is undoubtful that
tourism
Use synonyms
 plays a significant role in every person's life and becomes influential from day to day. What I mean here is that with the progress of
tourism
Use synonyms
, some aspects of individuals' lives are getting more easier providing better services.
For example
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, by visiting some places
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
 can increase their awareness about local areas and products
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
also
Linking Words
 spread about them recommending
Correct pronoun usage
them in
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social media or
people
Change preposition
to people
show examples
 they know.
That is
Linking Words
 the way how
tourism
Use synonyms
 is developing
by
Change preposition
through
show examples
 local goods and sightseeing that attract foreigners' attention.
However
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, by drawing foreigners' attention enormous companies that own rest facilities have to deal with serious issues like
air
Use synonyms
 and water
pollutions
Fix the agreement mistake
pollution
show examples
due to
Linking Words
 the development of
air
Use synonyms
 travel, transportation and mess water
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 are
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
essential needs in
Use synonyms
tourism
Add an article
the tourism
show examples
 industry. Several visitors all over the world do not know how to behave in public places and do what they want.
For instance
Linking Words
, they throw
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
litter anywhere and smoke where they want to, not paying attention to local principles.
Therefore
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, many incredible sightseeings are being polluted because of
this
Linking Words
 kind of people, who do not respect
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
 they visit, as they think that they are not obliged. In conclusion, I strongly believe that the state of each country should not limit
touristic
Replace the word
tourist
show examples
 zones by imposing extra taxes on flights and rest facilities,
instead
Linking Words
 of
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
, they could undertake strict rules in
such
Linking Words
 places and enforce tourists, who do not follow the rules to pay certain fees.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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