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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below gives some of the most reported issues among people living in UK cities in 2008 (%). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives some of the most reported issues among people living in UK cities in 2008 (%). Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#people #uk #cities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The depicted chart illustrates the three mainly reported issues among citizens in six
cities
Use synonyms
 in the UK in 2008 in percentages. The accounted issues were
health
Use synonyms
 service,
education
Use synonyms
 and training, and
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
. It can clearly be seen that
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 was the least significant issue in all presented
cities
Use synonyms
 as
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
Newcastle, Belfast, Birmingham, Cardiff, Manchester, Glasgow, and London. It is allocated only for approximately 5% to 15%.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
education
Use synonyms
 and
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
 are revealed to be a much graver issue in all
cities
Use synonyms
, ranging from 45% to almost 60%. The most significant issue in the whole chart referred to
health
Use synonyms
 services in Belfast and Cardiff (almost 60%, respectively). Remarkably,
health
Use synonyms
 services were only overtaken by
education
Use synonyms
 and training in two YOU USE
THIS
Linking Words
 WORD TOO OFTEN, CONSIDER REPLACING IT WITH metropoliscentermunicipalitydowntownplacecapitalcities: Glasgow and London.
To sum up
Linking Words
, inhabitants of the largest
cities
Use synonyms
 in the UK seemed to care more about
health
Use synonyms
 services
as well as
Linking Words
education
Use synonyms
 and training than about
air
Use synonyms
pollution
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by i.reichwaldt on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words cities, health, education, air, pollution with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • significant issue
  • high percentage
  • real estate market
  • traffic congestion
  • transportation issues
  • urban areas
  • health services
  • dissatisfaction
  • healthcare facilities
  • crime rates
  • safety
  • law enforcement
  • education and employment issues
  • job market
  • educational systems
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