IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The line chart illustrates the kinds of propose that make individuals travel from the city centre of the country
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 study ,work, adventure or living as a family,over the 15 periods. from an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective,studying and working are the main causes that make people decide to change their place to find a new chance ,
However
Linking Words
, the highest
pr
Correct your spelling
per
show examples
 cent was people moves by employment.
According to
Linking Words
 the chart given , it can be seen clearly that, study and work immigration percentage is the near employment started in the early period in 2000 over 80000 people was moved subsequences study pupils,at a rate 8000 at the same time .
while
Linking Words
 the proportion of workers has a slight decline , both of them stood
at the end
Linking Words
 of 2015 .family moving observed has elite and gradually increased from the beginning to be in rate 2000 at 2015.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "moves" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: