Watching a live performance such as a play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#live #performance #play #concert #event #television

It is said that watching a live

performance

namely a play, concert, or sporting event is more interesting than watching the same event on

. I totally disagree with

this

statement because watching live

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

via

is convenient,

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

affordabel

Correct your spelling

affordable

, and healthy .

To begin

with, there are several reasons why I believe watching

live

Correct article usage

a live

show examples

performance

through

Change preposition

show examples

television

is better than attending it

in-person

Correct your spelling

in person

show examples

. The primary

advantange

Correct your spelling

advantage

of watching

live

Add an article

the live

show examples

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

through

Change preposition

show examples

television

covenience

Correct your spelling

convenience

convenient

. To illustrate,

people

do not need to travel to the place of

performance

, which means

people

can save a considerable amount of time and effort. Affordable is another benefit of watching live

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

through

Change preposition

show examples

This

is because

people

do not require to purchase

performance

tickets , which means

people

can see live

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

without worrying about

finanical

Correct your spelling

financial

aspects.

Consequently

, these factors can make

experience

Add an article

the experience

show examples

of watching live

live

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

through

Change preposition

show examples

television

more entertaining than attending it physically.

Finally

, watching

live

Add an article

the live

show examples

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

through

Change preposition

show examples

television

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

the healthy

show examples

method.

This

due to

the fact that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

people

can watch

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

thorugh

Correct your spelling

through

form

Correct your spelling

from

show examples

their homes in

quiet

Add an article

a quiet

show examples

place

Fix the agreement mistake

places

show examples

. In comparison, attending live

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

in-person is overcrowded.

As a result

watch

Wrong verb form

watching

show examples

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

thorugh

Correct your spelling

through

Correct your spelling

show examples

less

Correct article usage

a less

show examples

noise

Replace the word

noisy

show examples

environment.

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

means

people

can enjoy the experience of

performance

without distractions .

To sum up

, I strongly believe that watching

the

Correct article usage

show examples

live

performance

via

is a best than attending physically

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

because watching

performance

Correct article usage

a performance

show examples

via

is comfortable, inexpensive, and provide

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

way to enjoy

the

Correct article usage

show examples

live

performance

namely, music,

theater

Change the spelling

theatre

show examples

, and concert.

Submitted by faiz3177 on Fri Jul 21 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

immersive experience
replicated
energy
atmosphere
sense of community
shared excitement
unforgettable
predictable
convenience
comfort
crowds
travel
multiple camera angles
close-ups
replays
enhancing

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Watching a live performance such as a play, concert, or sporting event is more enjoyable than watching the same event on television. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Compared to past, more people are now trying to learn a foreign language to increase their chances of landing a better job in their native country or to have better opportunities to work abroad. To what extent do you agree with this point of view?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

The housing shortage in big cities can cause severe social consequences. Some people think only government action can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the above statement?

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement??

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the cause? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?