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Band 3.5

Reasearch into new medicines and treatments is essential. Should this research be paid for by private companies or by the government?

#reasearch #medicines #treatments #research #companies #government
Nowadays, people are facing many poor diseases because of tacking strange
virus
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viruses
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 and toxic
material
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materials
show examples
.
This
 is significantly crucial to develop new medicines and
treatment
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treatments
show examples
 by researchers. There are some arguments to be funded by private enterprises or public ones. In my opinion, I
belive
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believe
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 that the reasonable
aproach
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approach
 is both
strageties
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strategies
 between private and public companies. Actually, there are a lot of
the
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apply
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major contributions by private firms to discover and bring new drugs and
treatment
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treatments
show examples
 to market. They have invested
many
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in many
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 advanced machines and
techonologies
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technologies
 during their
succesfully
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successful
successfully
 studying process. They
also
 have paid for
a groups
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groups
a group
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 of experts in relevant fields and
mordern
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modern
 laboratories.
Therefore
,
this
 is leading to the high prices of drugs or
treatment
, some patients may limit in touching for a cure.
In contrast
, the
governemnt
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government
 can focus on public health priorities and bring benefits to the community. It is easy for
a groups
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groups
a group
show examples
 of poor citizens to approach a
treatment
such
 as the diseases of lungs and diabetes,…
Besides
 that, the government issue advanced policies to support
to
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apply
show examples
private enterprises together
find
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to find
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new
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a new
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treatment
 to increase
effectively
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effectiveness
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 in medical
reasearch
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research
. In summary, I hope that both private finance and taxpayers’ money are encouraged to
reasearch
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research
 and develop new
medicaland treatmnet
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medical treatments
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
may
Correct your spelling
many
show examples
 people as
posible
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possible
.
Submitted by khoiminhnguyen1411 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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