The top priority of business is making moneyb , and they do not need to have social responsibilities . To what extent do you agree or disagree

There is
widespeard
Correct your spelling
widespread
recognition that businesses put a high priority on generating
profits
thus
these organizations are not required to have social responsibilities .
While
I accept
this
argument is slightly reasonable , I
belive
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believe
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that the
simualtaneous
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simultaneous
combination of both reducing money and social duties would generate
meaningful
Correct quantifier usage
more meaningful
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results than making money
solety
Correct your spelling
solely
. On the one hand , the majority of companies treat maximizing
profits
as a prime aim
beacause
Correct your spelling
because
of a large number of driving factors . First of all , the more firm revenues are generated , the more tax financial estimates are created in a nation . Indeed , when corporations have high
profits
, they would give more for income tax ,
thus
, the government has more budgets to invest to improve public infrastructures
such
as roads , transportation , monuments ,
public
Correct word choice
and public
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spaces which could
substaintially
Correct your spelling
substantially
boost citizen's living quality .
Furthermore
, the
companies
Change noun form
company's
show examples
financial plan plays an integral role in creating job opportunities . When a company is in a profitable situation , it tends to establish new agencies or
subsiaries
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subsidiaries
, which
provides
Correct subject-verb agreement
provide
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a host of vacancies for those who are
unemloyed
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unemployed
.
On the other hand
, I believe corporations should be encouraged to
takeobligation
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take obligation
into consideration alongside maximizing
profits
because of a number of compelling reasons . One reason is that a company's production process may lead to
environmetal
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environmental
degradation .
For instance
, factory
emmisions
Correct your spelling
emissions
eliminated from factories' production process affect people's health .
Besides
that , contaminated water has the same problem and needs a lot of fees to be processed . Because of that , many factories decide to dump illegally into water sources so as to damage marine life and to the environment as a whole . Another reason is that philanthropic actions are essential for an optimistic brand image . If business
excutives
Correct your spelling
executives
conduct more charitable projects for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
such
as giving financial support to people experiencing disasters or facilitating miserable children to have an adequate education ,
this
would make citizens
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
a
favorable
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favourable
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mind
of
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for
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their
bussiness
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business
. In brief ,
while
I agree that maximizing revenue is the key factor
that is
compulsory for each firm,s prosperity , I would contend that social accountability should
also
be encouraged simultaneously .
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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