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Band 4

Most of the urgent problems can only be solved with international cooperation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#cooperation
When it comes to
emergency
 issues, some said that they should only rely on help from other nations to solve the problems,
while
 other individuals think that the incidents can be
deal
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dealt
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 with by
supports
Fix the agreement mistake
support
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 in the country. I personally disagree with the statement that we depend on
global scale
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global-scale
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cooperations
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cooperation
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 to solve the crisis, since there could be drawbacks to counting on foreign
supports
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support
show examples
.
Firstly
, it takes more time for
anther
Correct your spelling
another
show examples
 nations’s
support
 to arrive. Since the problem is urgent, counting on help from other countries could lead to
miss
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missing
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 the best opportunity to deal with the situation immediately.
Also
, local
support
team
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teams
show examples
 who are located closer to the site can respond to the issue immediately by gathering up resources and planning
the
Correct article usage
apply
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solutions. All in all, local people can respond to the problem more quickly in order to mitigate the situation.
Secondly
, it is hard to organize
support
 teams and resources come from different countries when an
emergency
 crisis occurred
,
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apply
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 since the situation could be chaotic with the spread of misleading
informations
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information
pieces of information
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.
Also
, the
language
 barrier could be a
difficulties
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difficulty
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 since not all foreign personnel
familiar
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are familiar
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 with the local
language
 and customs, so it might be difficult for them to
support
in
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apply
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the site. On the other
hands
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hand
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, local
emergency
 services personnel can communicate directly with the victims using their native
language
, which can speed up the processes and
avoiding
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avoid
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 misunderstanding.
As a result
, domestic rescues are more supportive
due to
 familiarity
of
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with
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local
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the local
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 culture and
language
.
Overall
, I
support
 that urgent situations can be solved by national
emergency
 services with faster
respond
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response
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 time and the knowledge of
local
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the local
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 environment.
Submitted by yienliu0019 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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