Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the reasons? What could be done to solve this problem?

Some people put forth the argument that
students
are difficult to focus
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
the lessons in school. In
this
essay, I will address the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
problem and propose some possible solutions. First of all, modern technologies must be
condem
Correct your spelling
condemned
for the distraction of
students
. With a small handset,
students
can listen to music, play video
games
or read
comic
Fix the agreement mistake
comics
show examples
without
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
notice from the teachers.
A research
Remove the article
Research
show examples
indicate
Change the verb form
indicates
show examples
that
students
, including the studious one, find it difficult to not look at the screen to check the notice from social media.
In addition
, the traditional way of teaching might be too boring. Several
students
feel bored and exhausted when they just listen to the teacher and note
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the notebook, so it is easy for them to
lost
Change the form of the verb
lose
show examples
their concentration.
For instance
, I,
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
highschool students
a highschool student
show examples
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
show examples
students
, usually see my friends play video
games
or sleep in the class after fifteen minutes because they
fell
Correct your spelling
feel
show examples
bored.
Therefore
, the
state of the art
Add a hyphen
state-of-the-art
show examples
gadgets and boring way of teaching will lead to the disconcentration of
students
. Fortunately, there are
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of solutions
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
be applied to solve
this
issue.
Firstly
,
students
should mute their personal phones before the class, so they are not distracted by the noise.
Moreover
, they can shut
the
Change the word
their
show examples
phones down, so they do not play
games
and focus on the
lesson
.
Secondly
,
teacher
Add an article
the teacher
a teacher
show examples
should change their teaching way. They should interact with
students
rather than just read from
book
Fix the agreement mistake
books
show examples
. To demonstrate, my teacher at school usually
use
Correct subject-verb agreement
uses
show examples
powerpoint
Correct your spelling
PowerPoint
to add more images for the
lesson
, and
sometime
Replace the word
sometimes
show examples
they prepare funny
games
which are
associate
Wrong verb form
associated
show examples
with the
lesson
.
Hence
,
shut
Wrong verb form
shutting
show examples
down phones and
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
the
curricurum
Correct your spelling
curriculum
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
more interesting can solve the problem. In conclusion,
latest
Correct article usage
the latest
show examples
smartphones and boring
curricurum
Correct your spelling
curricula
cause distraction
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
students
.
However
,
those problem
Change the determiner
that problem
those problems
show examples
can
be solve
Change the verb form
be solved
show examples
by
shut
Wrong verb form
shutting
show examples
down the devices and
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
the
lesson
livelier
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
images and
games
.
Submitted by cathyngo1512 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The logical structure in the essay is weak, and the introduction and conclusion are not well developed. The main points are only partially supported with relevant examples and explanations.
task achievement
The essay partially addresses the task, but the response lacks depth and thoroughness. The ideas are not fully developed, and the examples provided are limited in their support of the arguments.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • concentration
  • attention span
  • distractions
  • technology
  • boredom
  • tiredness
  • engagement
  • learning disabilities
  • teaching techniques
  • classroom size
  • family issues
  • health problems
  • motivational strategies
What to do next:
Look at other essays: