A country's future depends on it's young people. Therefore, a country should invest heavily in its youth. Do you agree or disagree?

It is reckoned that young citizens are able to define their country’s future,

hence

, a country ought to invest significantly in its youth. From my aspect, I, 16, strongly agree with the thought. At first glance, a fair portion of people recommend that each budget offer benefits to young folks

as a result

of the following development since it is believed that kids will be effective in any side either finance or technology,

that is

, despite the bottom dollars left, it

also

should be bet for supporting the adolescent.

For instance

, it is

sure

Correct word choice

certain

show examples

that

elder

Correct word choice

elderly

show examples

crowds have many different thoughts compared to children as commonly seen nowadays. Not forgetting to mention that, undeniably, their interactions are not always right, in parallel, new thoughts offered by the kids can turn up new visions. On top of that, the earth does not stop all the time, it keeps moving

thus

many countries start developing in order to be the best so the children are

such

a crucial factor since many merits appear among the adolescent working together. To illustrate, many research

represent

Verb problem

studies show

show examples

that kids can work faster and more effectively than normal people with a dearth of fast learning even though the decisions made sometimes is wrong, on the flip side, mistakes can give one the development

To sum up

, I opine that investing in youth can

make

Verb problem

put

show examples

a country in a better position in the future

due to

the benefits following. Even if some bad incidents occur,

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

brings

Correct subject-verb agreement

bring

show examples

one bigger success.

Submitted by amittawin on Fri Jul 28 2023

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Task Response

The introduction lacks clarity and coherence. It is important to clearly present your opinion and provide a brief overview of the main points you will discuss in the essay.

Coherence and Cohesion

The essay lacks clear organization and connection between ideas. Use appropriate linking words and cohesive devices to improve the overall coherence and cohesion of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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A country's future depends on it's young people. Therefore, a country should invest heavily in its youth. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people prefer to eat at food stands or restaurants. Other people prefer to prepare and eat food at home. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factor, such as momey and appearance. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

task 2: in some countries, young people have become richer, healthier anf live longer, but they are less happy. What are the causes? What can be done to address this situation?

Some people believe that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, believe that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In some cities, public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own food and vegetables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?