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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that all students should study history as a major subject, while others feel that other subjects are important for children today. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

It is said that by knowing
Use synonyms
history
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history,
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 one can pave the way for a better future. Some argue that the past must be taught as a main
subject
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subject,
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while
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 others say that other
subjects
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 are more important in the modern
world
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. In
this
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,
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apply
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essay
I
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, I
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will discuss
about
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apply
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that
Correct determiner usage
apply
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the two viewpoints and give my opinion on the subject.
While
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its
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it's
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 important to be abreast with the technology in the modern
world
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 and other
subjects
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 related to it,
its
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it's
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 crucial that one must
also
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 understand how humans were able to come so far and that part of
history
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so
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, so
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 it is not only important but necessary to know the past
which
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, which
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 teaches about the mistakes
as well as
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 good things.
For example
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,
If
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if
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 a person is developing a new material that might help in the advancement of technology. It's integral to know what efforts and experiments were made in the past
which
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, which
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 yielded positive results and the ones which were not so fruitful.
Furthermore
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,
It's
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it's
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important to be aware of the former times of the
world
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 because it helps us understand the changes that have taken place which the passage of time. Having said that, it's important to understand that in the modern
,
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apply
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world
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children
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, children
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 will need knowledge of modern
subjects
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 that will help in their
overall
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 development and make them ready for the challenges of the new age. It will equip them
in getting
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to get
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 jobs and
further
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 develop their technology. In conclusion,
It's
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it's
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 vital for all learners to know and understand
history
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along with
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 other
subjects
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 that will make them future-ready for the development of the human race. A balanced approach must be adopted in teaching learners with the right mix of
subjects
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helping
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, helping
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 them understand
history
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 and empowering them to excel in future.

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structure
Open with a clear idea of your view and what you will discuss in your essay.
coherence
Make each paragraph have one main idea and a clear topic sentence.
grammar
Use shorter sentences. Watch long runs on and fix punctuation.
grammar
Check small grammar mistakes like its/it's and proper use of capital letters.
content
Give more strong examples that fit the topic to back up your points.
cohesion
Use simple and clear link words to show how ideas are connected.
content
You show you want to talk about both sides and give a view.
structure
The ending says a balance, which fits the task.
language
You use linking words that help flow the ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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