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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people believe children should begin learning a foreign language in primary school instead of secondary school. Do you think the advantages of learning a foreign language in primary school outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #children #language #school
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Learning other
languages
Use synonyms
 has been seen at different
Use synonyms
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 to start by people’s attitude. Some argue elementary school would be better regarding
postpone
Change the verb form
postponing
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 that until middle school. Considering an essential rule of
languages
Use synonyms
 as the determined features in people’s achievement over the long-
time
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 there is more privilege on
this
Linking Words
 idea. It is generally admitted that having a balance point is one of the most requirements in
early
Correct article usage
the early
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 ages of acquisition.
Accordingly
Linking Words
, to some view, if children are going
to begin
Linking Words
 learning
languages
Use synonyms
 later
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
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 might be more likely to strongly keep that. Basically, books
such
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 as
the
Capitalize word
The
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 Touch
stone
Capitalize word
Stone
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 prepare planes for
teenager
Fix the agreement mistake
teenagers
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 serious as much as adults, which means
this
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time
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 is estimated more suitable for inception.
However
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, all popular books have variate
design
Fix the agreement mistake
designs
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 for kids with simpler content.
For instance
Linking Words
, there is more picture beside
of
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apply
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words
for
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to
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 emotionally motivate them. So, despite having heavy-going priority in secondary schools,
evidently
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,evidently
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 the first years in schools have
evaluated
Add a missing verb
been evaluated
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appropriate
Change preposition
as appropriate
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 too.
On the other hand
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, it would be convincible that children are capable to gather other
languages
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 as
easy
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easily
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 as native.
Conversely
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, after a
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while
Add a comma
,while
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 they need a
coherence
Replace the word
coherent
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 plane and must study harder.
For example
Linking Words
, the process of learning native
languages
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 illuminates
this
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 fact,
firstly
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 concept
then
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 a picture of that and
secondly
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 the words are going to be fixed in their brain.
Accordingly
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, if they engage with that, leaving those
languages
Use synonyms
 turns impractical. Indeed, children take it plain just like a game
while
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 many years later, it may be changed into a challenge for them. As a straight sample, in my country being
master
Correct article usage
a master
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on
Change preposition
of
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 English for both young and old people is an issue, so they feel regretful why procrastinate from childhood
time
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. So
overall
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, I believe,
although
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 learning
in particular
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 has never been far from communities, grape the
time
Use synonyms
 is
turning
Correct article usage
a turning
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 point for those who are quite successful.
Consequently
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, there is nothing to be seen as a drawback, regarding how older find that
as
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apply
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a problem.
Submitted by fami on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cognitive development
  • Pronunciation
  • Fluency
  • Brain plasticity
  • Cultural awareness
  • Globalized world
  • Proficiency
  • Educational opportunities
  • Motivation
  • Resource constraints
  • Specialized teachers
  • Academic pressure
  • Parental involvement
  • Curriculum balance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: