IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

You recently organised an all-day meeting for your company, which took place in a local hotel. In their feedback, participants at the meeting said that they liked the hotel, but they were unhappy about the food that was served for lunch. Write a letter to the manager of the hotel. In your letter • say what the participants liked about the hotel • explain why they were unhappy about the food suggest what the manage� should do to improve the food in future

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
I hope
this
Linking Words
 email finds you in radiant health and you are doing well. I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to express concerns about the
overall
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 services that we took during the day-long meeting in your hotel
last
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 week. In the very first place, I would like to inform you that our participants were pleased with some facilities in the hotel
such
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 as the spacious meeting room with a comfy environment and the availability of speedy Wi-Fi connection throughout the hotel.
However
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, our all meeting attendees were uncomfortable in terms of using the washroom facilities.
This
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 is because most of the time water supply was not available and there was no separate washroom which is why female participants were really disappointed
while
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 using the common toilet facilities.
Hence
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, I will suggest some ideas with a view to fixing the aforementioned problems.
Firstly
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, you may set up a separate water tank to ensure a continuous water supply.
Secondly
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, you may build a separate washroom for females to ease their frustration. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Ron

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Task Achievement
Be clear about the purpose of the letter from the beginning, and ensure that each paragraph addresses a specific point related to the task. The introduction could be more concise and directly related to the purpose of writing.
Task Achievement
The participants' feedback about the food should be the main focus of the letter as per the task instructions, whereas the letter focuses mainly on the washroom facilities. Make sure to address all bullet points given in the task.
Coherence & Cohesion
Organize ideas clearly within paragraphs. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and supporting sentences that relate directly to that main idea.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a variety of linking words and phrases to show connections between ideas and paragraphs, improving the flow of the letter.
Task Achievement
Maintain a polite and formal tone throughout the letter appropriate to the context of writing to a hotel manager to give feedback and suggestions.
Coherence & Cohesion
Ensure a clear greeting and closing as per the conventions of letter writing. The greeting and closing used are appropriate, but the closing could be linked more closely with the preceding content.
Task Achievement
Review the task instructions and make sure your letter adheres to the requirements - in this case, the hotel's feedback is about the food, not washroom facilities.

The Greeting

Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.

Always start an informal letter in the ways:

  • Dear + name
  • Hi / Hello + name

‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.

For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:

  • Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
  • Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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