Some people believe that the personal information of violent criminals should be made available to the public. Others think that this information should be protected. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #criminals

It is a common belief that the background of violent villains should be confidential from society.

However

, a more persuasive argument is that the

residents

had better be informed of that information.

This

is because it can raise

people

's awareness of the possibilities of

crime

. On the one hand, some

people

believe that keeping personal information secret will give violent offenders chances to rebuild their own

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

. When few individuals have the biography of the criminals, they will no longer be status-discriminated when reintegrating into society.

According to

some recent research, over 90% of villains whose profiles were protected from the public said that they had no problem with the

residents

and become better since they left the prison.

As a result

, they are more optimistic about their future and give up committing crimes again.

Nevertheless

, it is more advisable to expose the biography of violent criminals to each citizen to give them a wake-up call about the

crime

. By publishing the private

background

Fix the agreement mistake

backgrounds

show examples

of the offenders, the government may help

people

realize the worst perspectives to avoid.

For example

, in Vietnam, all of the criminal cases of violence are broadcast to the

residents

so that no more

crime

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

occurs and the society is always peaceful.

Therefore

, to both educate

people

and prevent them from committing crimes, being well-informed about the offenders' profiles is indispensable. In conclusion,

although

a secret in the background may benefit criminals and help them to remake their

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

, the

residents

should still

be acknowledged

Wrong verb form

acknowledge

show examples

this

information because it can restrain and minimise the tendency of

crime

Submitted by songvangproduce on Tue Aug 01 2023

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task response

The essay adequately addresses the topic and presents relevant arguments. Ensure to provide clear examples and ideas to support the arguments further.

coherence cohesion

Improve the use of transition words and ensure a clearer link between sentences and paragraphs. The conclusion should summarise the main points more effectively.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that the personal information of violent criminals should be made available to the public. Others think that this information should be protected. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Your opinion

in some countries an increasing number of people are suffering from healthy problem as a result of eating too much fast food. it is therefore necessary for governments to impose a higher tax on this kind of food. To what extend do you agree or disagree ?

“Parents of obese children should be punished for making them fat. Do you agree or disagree?”

In recent years a large number of highly professionals like doctors, engineers and IT professionals from poorer businesses are leaving their countries for developed countries for better-paying jobs. What are the possible problems of this and what solutions can you suggest to deal with this issue?

who cause children obesity? parents or fast food outlets. do you agree or disagree

Some scientists think that there are intelligent life forms on other planets and messages should be sent to contact them. Other scientists think it is a bad idea and would be dangerous. Discuss both views and give your opinion.