Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but others believe it is not the government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #government #health #care #education #government’s #responsibility

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A school of thought holds that the authorities should spend money on society's health facilities

whereas

the alternative stance asserts that it is not the

government

's function. In

this

essay, I will discuss two sides of

this

problem and describe my own opinion. There are many reasons why the

government

should pay for education and

healthcare

Firstly

, citizens have to pay a lot of taxes when they are working. Obviously, they are able to use these services for free.

Moreover

, healthy and educated residents can have more career prospects that result in the national economic

developments

Fix the agreement mistake

development

show examples

For instance

, educated people have more ability to reach career prospects so that they can have well-paid jobs and

that is

beneficial for the development of a nation.

Besides

, it can reduce crime in societies. All of that leads to a peaceful and wealthy country.

On the other hand

, many people believe that providing

healthcare

and education is not the

government

's responsibility. If the

government

pays for

healthcare

and schooling, it will put a strain on public finances.

Besides

, the authorities have other issues to consider

such

as enhancing infrastructures and strengthening national security. In a nutshell,

eventhough

Correct your spelling

even though

it is reasonable to free

healthcare

and schooling by the

government

's budget. In my point of view, it is what the authorities should do, because of the taxes that citizens have to pay when they are working and the ability to enhance social harmony and national economics.

Submitted by weezel on Tue Aug 01 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the essay has a clear logical structure. While the main points are presented, the connection and transitions between them could be enhanced for better clarity.

coherence cohesion

A clear introduction and conclusion are present, however, both could be made stronger by having more defined thesis statements and summaries of the main points.

coherence cohesion

Support main points with carefully selected examples and explanations. In this essay, the examples provided are somewhat generic and could be more specific to demonstrate a clear understanding of the topic.

task achievement

The response should be complete, addressing all parts of the task thoroughly. The essay could benefit from a more detailed exploration of both viewpoints, as well as a more in-depth explanation of the writer's own opinion.

task achievement

Ideas should be clear and comprehensive, presented in a way that is easy to understand. Strive to clarify and deepen the explanations for each viewpoint and your own opinion for a stronger argument.

task achievement

Use relevant and specific examples to underline your points. The essay lacks detailed and pertinent examples that could substantiate the arguments more effectively.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

6.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

241 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

access
basic services
inequality
social cohesion
public health
well-being
human capital
economic development
individual responsibility
educational attainment
taxpayers
inefficiency
lack of choice
private sector
quality
innovation
accessible
affordable
role

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Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but others believe it is not the government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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