Crime rates are increasing in the recent years in all countries and it is becoming more violent . Why do you think is? What can be done for it?

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Nobody would dispute the fact that the

rising

Replace the word

rise

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of criminalization occurs all over the world and becoming more serious these days. I hold the view that these things

happened

Wrong verb form

happen

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because the basic things for life (how to be a good person) in socials are not taught in school.

This

Linking Words

essay will explain the trigger for

this

Linking Words

problem and how to fix it.

Firstly

Linking Words

, many schools

Linking Words

this day

Correct your spelling

today

show examples

do not have a curriculum for students that consists of tutorials on how to have a good social life. One of the most important is how to have good financial planning for their life. The drawbacks of not teaching

this

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matter will affect the future that the students will be facing

hardly in

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hard

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financial problems.

Furthermore

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, criminal acts will not be avoided of because

this

Linking Words

problem.

For example

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, in Indonesia, research from the Ministry of Law stated that seven out of ten people commit criminal acts because of financial problems.

However

Linking Words

, the governments can make

this

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matter controlled. They have to include the teaching about financial planning in high schools when the pupils

started

Wrong verb form

start

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to have money independently. For parents, they must start to teach their children about simple things in finances.

For instance

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, at the kindergarten stage, they can teach the habit

to save

Change preposition

of saving

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money that the children

received

Wrong verb form

receive

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for pocket money.

To sum up

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, I believe that the unlawful act might be pressed by governments and the parents themselves. It is prevented from the child age in schools and teach good habit to them in financial matters.

galihwFri Aug 04 2023

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coherence cohesion

Improve the logical structure of your essay by organizing your ideas more coherently.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that your introduction and conclusion effectively address the topic and your main points are supported throughout the essay.

task achievement

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

crime rates
violent crimes
economic disparities
social structures
urbanization
rehabilitation programs
law enforcement
values erosion
substance abuse
media influence
community-based programs
poverty
unemployment
public-private partnerships
organized crime
trafficking
cross-sector collaboration
preventative measures
statutory sentencing
juvenile delinquency

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Crime rates are increasing in the recent years in all countries and it is becoming more violent . Why do you think is? What can be done for it?

Some parents say that children should play individually more than in a group. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and include your own opinion.

Nowadays, more people are choosing to socialise online than face to face . Why is this happening? Is this a positive or negative development?

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

Some think that it is more important for children to engage in outdoor activities instead of playing videogames. To what extent to you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that it is good to hare as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. discuss both these views and give your own opinion.