The graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK.

#patterns #access #technology #homes #uk

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The

chart

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demonstrates the proportions of different contemporary technologies in

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households between 1994 to 2008.

Overall

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, the proportion of all four technologies increased during the period,

while

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DVD players were the latest-appeared but the fastest-grown device among all. The CD player was first seen in 1994/95, owned by 40% of

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families,

then

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it began to rise until it reached its peak in 2004/05, with nearly 90% of

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families having it.

In addition

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, the mobile phone was introduced in 1996/1997, starting at 18%,

then

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it began to fluctuate and saw an improved trend until 2004/05 at approximately 80%

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while

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remaining stable for the rest of the period. The Internet didn’t show up in the first two time periods

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but appeared in 1998/99 with 10% usage in

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homes,

although

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it saw a gradual increase, in the final year in the

chart

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, it was the least-owned technology by

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households (67%). The DVD player was the latest product among all the technologies in the

chart

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apply

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however

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,however

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it was the fastest-increased during the time period. Started in 2002/03 at only 30%,

then

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it saw a significant increase and became the most popular product in the

chart

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in 2008, with almost 90% of

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families owning it.

Submitted by yienliu0019 on Sat Aug 05 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, uk with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

206 words

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The graph below shows the changing patterns of access to modern technology in homes in the UK.

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

In order to reduce crime,we need ti attack the causes of crime such as poverty and lack of educational opportunities. Itbis not enough to simply have more police on the street and put more people into prison. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think the money spent on developing technology for space exploration is not justified. However, there are more beneficial ways to spend this money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, experience is more valued in the workplace than knowledge in many countries. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.