Some people think that the best way to learn about business is to study a course at college or university. Others believe that there are other better ways to learn about business. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The future and the ways to be productive have continually been challenging for people. Academics have their own fan and paradoxically others find immediate businesses more logical than going to university. Both ideas have widely varied results in the case of different perspectives in life.
However
, in my view, there is no harm in academics even if it does not match with somebody. There are many reasons why students prefer to start working as soon as they finish high school. The first fundamental cause is associated with a wide range of talent, which means even if going to college has been proven as the best way, some students are not good at memorizing or researching.
For instance
, children with sort of disorders
such
as ADHD could not focus on tasks by would be perfect in other activities like sports. By the same token, some adults are in a rush to have income and do something else. The proof of that would be either common or personal like whenever family businesses are truly safe and strong to keep that alive.
On the other hand
, all those mentioned outlooks related be job appliances
instead
of going to university would adjust by the idea that both of them are able to happen simultaneously. In fact, a sporter with at least a bachelor’s degree has a better look in society and at the same time in personal condition.
In addition
, nowadays most universities bring
this
opportunity to work equivalent to studying.
However
, despite all adjustments, others who strongly insist
to have
Change preposition
on having
show examples
a suitable certification have been surer in terms of the job in the future. As an example, most interviewers for
job’s
Change noun form
job
show examples
positions
initially
investigate the degrees and
then
will set professional appointments. The other reality
also
is obvious, in any shape of activity, not only
educations
Fix the agreement mistake
education
show examples
not damaging but
also
might be seen as a verification behind people. To sum app, it seems entirely wrong to force folk to keep continuing their study. Indeed, there are several ways to be successful and all deserve respect. meanwhile, it is remarkable that even the degrees do not directly impact jobs, they indirectly have
this
capacity to improve the nation’s disciplines.
Submitted by fami on

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task response
The essay mainly addresses both views, but the points lack coherence and the ideas are not well-developed
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear logical structure, and the introduction and conclusion are not well-presented

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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