IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#aim #science #people #lives
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Many people have strong opinions about what is the most crucial goal of
science
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 and technology. I completely disagree with the idea that improving citizens’
lives
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 is the most vital use of
science
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, and I am going to consider below two arguments to support my position. In my opinion, the main reason is that
science
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 plays a vital role in breaking through outstanding problems in some expertise, which is not only in people's
lives
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 but
also
Linking Words
 in some meaningful areas,
such
Linking Words
 as medicine and spaceflight.
This
Linking Words
 means that
science
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 can help people figure out some unsolved questions that are very difficult to calculate by hand and human brains, which in turn cause
a
Correct article usage
apply
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rapid development in academics and
society
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 of the world.
For example
Linking Words
, global warming is a serious problem that needs to work out which uses a lot of
science
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 and technology to reduce the discharge of carbon by scientists. Fortunately, nowadays, there are many advance solutions and innovations to cope with it,
such
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 as electronic cars. The second reason is that
science
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also
Linking Words
 can be beneficial to the safety of
society
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 which is the fundamental basis of our daily life. If
science
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 could be used appropriately and widely by the government to protect citizens and construct organization systems,
this
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 would improve the productivity of civil servants immediately and efficiently, which could have a positive impact on the progress of the country and
society
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.
For example
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, through the use of big data, the polices are likely to hand out criminal cases and catch offenders, which could be an efficient and effective way to improve
society
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 and individual safety. With the technology of network security, it protects us from hackers and information leakage, which in turn guards our freedom and privacy.
Consequently
Linking Words
, I fundamentally disagree with the idea that improving residents’
lives
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 is the most important aim of
science
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. Despite the fact that increasing the environment and standard of citizens’
lives
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 is crucial and necessary, there are still some fields that need
science
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 which is more important than that.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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