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Band 5.5

Something that money is a good gift for teenagers. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#money #gift #teenagers
Discussing whether
money
 is a good gift for
teenagers
 or not. Both views have their own advantages and disadvantages. People who are adults and above the age of 30s, think differently as compared to
teenagers
. Let's discuss, why
teenagers
 think that it is good for them and why it's not good for
teenagers
. Being a teenager, I can help in supporting
this
 argument that
money
 plays an important role in youth.
For instance
, if an individual wants to pursue his/her master's degree from abroad right after his/her graduation,
then
 definitely he/her will make sure that they get admitted to top-rated universities around the world. If he/she doesn't have
money
 to take care of his/her finances
then
 eventually he/she might have to do a job to earn
money
 and bear his/her finances. During
this
 time, he/she might get involved in earning more
money
 and
consequently
, loses his interest in their master's degree.
This
 can create a negative impact on his/her career path and might regret it later. Let's discuss, why some people think that
money
 can create a negative impact on
Correct article usage
a
show examples
teenager's life. I believe, having a lot of
money
 can spoil children's life and the ability to progress in their careers. Many youngsters think that current financial stability will be enough for them to progress in their careers and they will easily make capital in future as well.
This
 is not valid in every case because sometimes people do not care about managing their financials but just spend freely.
This
 can create problems for them as they will start losing their
money
due to
 a lack of management abilities. If
teenagers
 spend their
money
according to
 their needs and maintain their financials
then
 I believe it will be a good start to
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 how they can manage their financials.
Submitted by ahsanaly.94 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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