An increasing number of people are choosing to have cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why are more people choosing to have operation to change the way they look? Do you think this a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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A growing majority of individuals in today's culture decide to have cosmetic

surgery

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in order to enhance their physical

appearance

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Although

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some might argue that

this

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is a negative development, I consider that having cosmetic

surgery

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can improve a

person

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's quality of life. People may improve their sense of self-worth and confidence by taking better care of their bodies, which can result in a happier outlook on life. In the first place, people wish to alter their

appearance

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for a variety of reasons. The pressure from society to live up to frequently unachievable ideals of beauty is one factor.

Therefore

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, in an attempt to fit in, many feel pressured to match the ideals of beauty that the media presents. Addressing physical flaws that make people feel dissatisfied with their

appearance

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is another concern.

For example

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, someone with a crooked nose can decide to have a rhinoplasty to straighten it out and feel better about how they look.

Similarly

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, cosmetic

surgery

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may elevate a

person

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's quality of life by boosting their dignity and sense of self-assurance. A

person

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is more likely to feel comfortable about themselves when they are happy with the way they are perceived. A woman who has breast augmentation,

for instance

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, can feel more confident about their

appearance

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and engage in activities they had previously shied away from because they were insecure.

Additionally

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, by lowering anxiety associated with physical traits, these surgeries may help improve one's particular mental health. Cosmetic

surgery

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carries certain potential dangers,

such

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as the risk of complications during the procedure.

However

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, these threats can be reduced by selecting a skilled surgeon and setting reasonable expectations for the results.

Furthermore

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, it's critical to understand that cosmetic

surgery

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shouldn't be used as a band-aid treatment for primary emotional issues. In conclusion,

while

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some might see plastic

surgery

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as undesirable, I think it can change a

person

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's level of contentment. Making an informed decision is crucial, just like with any medical procedure. The decision to get cosmetic

surgery

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should ultimately be a personal one

that is

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carefully thought through, considering both the advantages and disadvantages.

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task achievement

The essay demonstrates a fair understanding of the task and presents opinions on the topic, but could benefit from a more detailed exploration of the reasons behind why more people are choosing cosmetic surgery. A balanced view that compares both positive and negative aspects would enhance the response.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, with an appropriate structure. However, to improve cohesion, consider varying your connecting words and phrases to guide the reader more smoothly between ideas. Using a wider range of cohesive devices can enhance the readability and logical flow.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

348 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Idealized beauty standards
Cosmetic surgery
Advancements in medical technology
Socially acceptable
Self-improvement
Psychological well-being
Competitive workforce
Youthful appearance
Body dysmorphic disorder (BDD)
Physical appearance

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