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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the amount of energy generated from wind in four countries from 1985 to 2000.

The chart below shows the amount of energy generated from wind in four countries from 1985 to 2000.
#amount #energy #wind #four #countries
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The bar graph illustrates the comparison
Use synonyms
wind
Change preposition
of wind
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energy
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 generation in four countries ;
India
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 ,
Denmark
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 ,
Germany
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 and the United States in the year from 1985 to 2000.
Overall
Linking Words
 , we can see that the united states had
genereated
Correct your spelling
generated
 the highest
wind
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energy
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 as compared to other nations
in
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apply
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over the period .
Whereas
Linking Words
 , other nations
also
Linking Words
 indicated growth of production in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wind
Use synonyms
energy
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 . In 1985 ,
India
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 and
Denmark
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were generate
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generated
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 200
megawatts
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Use synonyms
wind
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of wind
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energy
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while
Linking Words
Germany
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 accounted doubled of both countries .
However
Linking Words
 , 1200
megawatts
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Use synonyms
wind
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of wind
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energy
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 produced by the united states
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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stand
Correct subject-verb agreement
stands
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to
Change preposition
at
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 the top of the list . After 15 years , it was
drastic
Correct article usage
a drastic
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 change
of
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in
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 generating
wind
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energy
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 in
Denmark
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 which was 60% of
total
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the total
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 and reached 1200
meagwatts
Correct your spelling
megawatts
.
Likewise
Linking Words
 ,
India
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 and
Germany
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 produced
similar
Change the article
a similar
the similar
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 number of
megawatts
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 (800) .
Whereas
Linking Words
 , the production of
wind
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energy
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 in the
Usa
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USA
 that significantly increased
with
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by
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 1600
megawatts
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 .
In addition
Linking Words
 , in 2000
Denmark
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 experienced the most significant expansion which
replaced
Add a missing verb
was replaced
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 by the USA and it stand
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
top
Add an article
the top
show examples
 of
list
Add an article
the list
show examples
 .
India
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 and the US generated 1200 and 1500
megawatts
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 respectively .
Whereas
Linking Words
 ,
Germany
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 had only 900
megawatts
Use synonyms
 produced.
Submitted by jeetkacha13 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words wind, energy, india, denmark, germany, megawatts with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "stand" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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