The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants.

The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for The bar chart below shows the numbers of men and women attending various evening courses at an adult education centre in the year 2009. The pie chart gives information about the ages of these course participants.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Given are the charts demonstrating the figures for gender and age distribution of adults who took part in different classes during the nighttime in 2009. -> mở bài ổn
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
it is clear that
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the numbers of women overtook those of men in almost all surveyed courses, except sculpture.[ar]
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, people who were aged over 50 accounted for the highest proportion of the total course
participants
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. ⇒
overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

ok It is evident from the bar chart that language and drama were the most preferred subjects among female students.[as] [at]The number of adult female students was exactly twice that of their male counterparts, with 40 females in the language class compared to 20 males, and 20 females in the drama class compared to 10 males.
Similarly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in the evening painting session, there were more female
participants
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

(30) than male
participants
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

(25).
Conversely
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, in the sculpture sessions, the participation of males was higher, with 10 attendees, approximately double the number of female
participants
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, which was only 5. ⇒ ok nhé Shifting the focus to the pie chart, individuals aged over 50 constituted the largest segment, accounting for 42% of the total
participants
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
while
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the smallest proportion was among those under 20 years old, making up only 5% of the total. [au]The age groups of
participants
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

in their 20s and 30s represented 11% and 16% of the total course attendees, respectively.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
Vocabulary: Replace the words participants with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "numbers of" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • attendance
  • participant
  • adult education
  • distribution
  • proportion
  • engaged
  • trend
  • mid-career
  • popularity
  • speculate
  • job-oriented
  • creative courses
  • leisure aspect
  • enroll
  • correlation
  • inclined
  • career-oriented
  • hobby-related
  • literacy
  • technical skills
What to do next:
Look at other essays: