Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree?

#improvement #health #education #trade #development #nations #governments #responsibility #areas

Some people believe in the notion that more economically developed countries should help poorer ones. I only partly disagree with the

above stated

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above-stated

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First,

there is no doubt that health, education and trade are the most important areas in a

country

's development and need special attention from the government. Without an adequate healthcare and education system the people of the

country

would not have the necessary abilities to help the

country

grow economically, which in consequence leads to less available funding for everything else. The

above described

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above-described

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cycle can be broken with the help from other richer countries but in no way these nations should take any kind of responsibility for

the others well-being

Change to a genitive case

the well-being of the other

the other's well-being

show examples

. On one hand, providing help will definitely benefit the other side

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

may be able to repay later on, and it is

also

a step forward to a better globalist future, where everyone is taking care of one another and paying attention only to their current situation, it is worth noting that in today's

world

Add a comma

,world

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this

is almost impossible because the more stable government should take resources from its people to give to the

comunity

Correct your spelling

community

of a

country

in a worse state,

therefore

risking its own stability and citizens' live quality a decision not worth taking. In conclusion, for more developed countries to help the poor once is a great idea in theory but it is hard to achieve without helping one suffering from

this

Submitted by evamironova65 on Sat Aug 19 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

239 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the governments of richer nations should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such areas. To what extent do you agree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Describe a process of geothermal power plant ? What is the diagram of? How many steps are there? What happens in each step? What are the components, or parts of the process? Is the process mechanical or natural, or both? Where does the process start? Where does it finish?

Nowadays, many young people are attracted to dangerous sports such as snowboarding or mountain biking. What makes these sports so attractive? What measures should be taken to minimize the risks?

many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an ageing population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. To what extent do the advantages of having an ageing population outweigh the disadvantages?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.