the chart below shows the results of a survey about people's coffee nd tea buying and drinking habits
The provided chart depicts the outcome of research on
people
who consume coffee
and tea whether buying or drinking in five cities in Australia during the last
four weeks.
It is clearly observed from the graph that people
had a stronger willingness to go to a café for these drinks. Whilst, fewer of them preferred to purchase fresh coffee
during the same period.
The figure for the public who brought fresh coffee
in Sydney was approximately as equal to that of Melbourne about 45%. Whilst, people
from Hobart had less willing to purchase fresh coffee
about 40%. In addition
, the proportions of people
in Brisbane and Adelaide who bought fresh coffee
were as equal to each other just under 35%. Furthermore
, About
Change preposition
For
people
who bought instant coffee
in the last
4 weeks, the most purchasing amount accounted for Hobart nearly 55% however
, this
figure decreased for people
in Brisbane by around 53%. While
the percentage of the public who purchased instant coffee
in Adelaide was 50%. Similarly
, this
trend had a decrease for people
in Melbourne and Sydney and those were 48% and 45%, respectively. Finally
, the percentage of individuals who went to a café in Hobart was as much as that of Melbourne around 63%. This
café lovers trend decreased to 61% for people
in Sydney. Whereas
, people
from Brisbane and Adelaide went to a café less often and these percentages were approximately 55% and 49%, respectively.Submitted by fatemeh.gh9797 on
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, coffee, café with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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