Nowadays ,a growing number of people with health problem are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is positive or a negative development .

Thease
Correct your spelling
These
days, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
people
with health issues
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
trying
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
alternative
medicine
and Solutions . They are not going to meet their usual doctor for
medicine
.I will discuss
this
topic and I give my opinion. On the one hand ,nowadays different types of help diseases in our countries many
people
are visiting their usual
doctors
for
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
medicine
, but some
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
are not going to their family
doctors
,because some
people
worry about money and time .
Accordingly
Add a comma
,Accordingly
show examples
most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
are trying
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
of homemade
medicine
. for instant, herbal
treatments
.Another thing, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
some
medicine
made at home and they are watching YouTube or other social media .
then
they try
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
of
medicine
Replace the word
medical
show examples
treatment
Fix the agreement mistake
treatments
show examples
 .
In
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
they are many
kind
Change to a plural noun
kinds
show examples
of
alternative
medicines and
treatments
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
social media or websites.But all videos are not including
right
Correct article usage
the right
show examples
medicine
Replace the word
medical
show examples
strategies. many of the
medicine
treatment videos are made
increasing
Change the verb form
to increase
show examples
their views ,but some
people
are trying to
this
theory .Next more
people
are using some
medicine
due to
other speaks. I think it is totally wrong because some
people
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
not
medicine
Replace the word
medical
show examples
knowledge. so We do not consider other talks . We consider about
doctors
Change noun form
doctor's
show examples
decision .
Subsequently
Add a comma
,Subsequently
show examples
some health problems are very hard.
Then
we have
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
alternative
treatments
. because we are not visiting
doctors
,
Whereas
some
people
are
death
Replace the word
dead
show examples
.Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
use
alternative
treatments
.
Then
they are facing
dangerous
Add an article
a dangerous
the dangerous
show examples
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
and some humans are
death
Replace the word
dead
show examples
. In conclusion ,I will have discussed, there are more
people
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
using
alternative
strategy
Fix the agreement mistake
strategies
show examples
for
medicine
instead
of visiting their usual
doctors
.I completely disagree with
this
topic . There are
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of negative
impact
Change to a plural noun
impacts
show examples
connected
our
Change preposition
to our
show examples
life and I think it is not good.
Submitted by heshanij9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicine
  • conventional medicine
  • holistic approach
  • personalized care
  • side effects
  • regulation
  • evidence-based
  • self-care
  • empowerment
  • holistic health centers
  • complementary treatments
  • dissatisfaction
  • scientific evidence
  • appropriate treatment
  • cultural beliefs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: