People often do not interact with their neighbours and this is harming community building. What are the possible causes and solutions? ‌

It is often thought that if some humankind does not deal with their neighbours,
this
attitude will have negative effects on the structure of their society.
This
essay will discuss the causes of
this
behaviour, and we will suggest some solutions. At the outset, nowadays, it is observed that individuals who live beside each other, we call them neighbours, do not interact together like what happened in the past era, so;
this
phenomenon has appeared
as a result
of certain reasons.
For example
, most
people
are busy, so; they do not have enough time to contact others.
In addition
to that, a lot of adolescents suffer from stressful life conditions, which make them prefer living alone,
hence
; the sense of isolation is widespread in the community.
Furthermore
, these days many households experience various kinds of problems,
therefore
; these troubles do not
confer
Verb problem
give
show examples
them the suitable opportunity to cooperate well with their surrounding neighbours.
Also
; youth spend much time for a lot of online activities
such
as social media or online games
Consequently
, if
this
negative attitude continues to spread widely among
people
, their communities will be in great danger, so; some solutions should be proposed to solve
this
problem drastically.
Firstly
, members of each society should
make
Verb problem
have
show examples
a meeting on a regular basis, and they should encourage all
people
to attend, so; it will be a good chance to recognize each other.
Moreover
, they should talk to them about the importance of recognition among all of them because if they cooperate together, their community will progress rapidly.
Secondly
, they should
enhance
Verb problem
encourage
show examples
all individuals to take part in social activities and social clubs,
for instance
; they should participate in
bicycles race
Fix the agreement mistake
bicycle races
show examples
or play football together. In conclusion, the government has to support all members of communities to enhance the spirit of recognition and cooperation among
people
in societies because if
this
notion is applied correctly, lots of positive consequences will be achieved, and they will get rid of
this
problem.
Submitted by sm710129 on

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task response
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and conciseness. The main points are not effectively supported by relevant examples and arguments. More focus on addressing the essay prompt is needed.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is somewhat maintained, but the essay lacks coherence and cohesion. The ideas are not presented in a cohesive manner, and the connections between the paragraphs are weak. Use of transition words and proper organization is needed for better coherence.
lexical resource
The essay exhibits a mix of simple and complex vocabulary, but there is a need for more varied and precise vocabulary to express the ideas effectively. Use of synonyms and more sophisticated language is recommended to improve the lexical resource.
grammatical range
The essay has frequent grammatical errors, including tense usage, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing. There is a need for better control of grammatical structures and more varied sentence structures to enhance grammatical range.

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