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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The following two pia charts show the results of a survey into the popularity of various leisure activities among European adults in1985 and in 1995.

The following two pia charts show the results of a survey into the popularity of various leisure activities among European adults in1985 and in 1995.
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The two pie charts illustrate the survey's
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
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 about the
adults's
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adults'
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 leisure activities in European countries in 1985 and 1995.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that watching TV remains the highest rank until the end of the period.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
1985
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in 1985
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 experienced
the
Correct article usage
apply
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most people
trend
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tend
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 to watching TV than talking with their friends, with 32% and 21%. Followed by, 23% of the adults spent their time in
restaurant
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restaurants
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, and the other categories were combined only 24%. Turning to the other pie chart, There were 30% of individuals that sitting in front of the TV,
this
Linking Words
 category was
slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
 lower
Linking Words
then
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than
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1985
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in 1985
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, and 27% of them were gamers.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the percentage
to
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of
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 talking with
friend
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friends
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 was
a
Correct article usage
apply
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slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
 increased to 26%. The other groups were only 17% when combined.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Leisure activities
  • Survey results
  • Popularity
  • European adults
  • Shift
  • Passive entertainment
  • Outdoor activities
  • Health consciousness
  • Lifestyle
  • Technological advancements
  • Cultural experiences
  • Personal enrichment
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