In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. (Write at least 250 words).

#today’s #world #families #parents #work #say #children #benefit #income #lack #support #parents’ #absence #reason

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Recently,

both

Use synonyms

parents

Use synonyms

going out for work is a tremendous necessity for many families to face a competitive world.

While

Linking Words

some say that

this

Linking Words

family’s children

having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

advantages as they get additional income to

support

Use synonyms

their educational and personal needs, others argue that

this

Linking Words

children

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

lack

Change preposition

apply

show examples

support

Use synonyms

by the absence of the

parents

Use synonyms

which

cause

Correct subject-verb agreement

causes

show examples

the character buildings’ disturbance.

To begin

Linking Words

with, having additional income through

both

Use synonyms

parents

Use synonyms

working is beneficial for the kids as they will have better

opportunity

Fix the agreement mistake

opportunities

show examples

to be fully supported for their educational and personal needs.

For example

Linking Words

, these youngsters can go to

best

Correct article usage

the best

show examples

school with

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

great facilities and curriculum wherever they want.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, they

also

Linking Words

will be granted for their

willingnes

Correct your spelling

willingness

as all the things they want

such

Linking Words

as toys,

entertainments

Fix the agreement mistake

entertainment

show examples

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

etc. will be easily provided by their

parents

Use synonyms

who go out to work.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, less

support

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through the absence of

both

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parents

Use synonyms

Wrong verb form

going

show examples

out for working may impact

childrens

Change to a genitive case

children's

show examples

character

buildings

Fix the agreement mistake

building

show examples

as they can be less educated

as well as

Linking Words

become more

introvert

Replace the word

introverted

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, these kids will be naughty and disrespectful to their

surrounding

Fix the agreement mistake

surroundings

show examples

as they are not well educated personally by

both

Use synonyms

busy

parents

Use synonyms

Moreover

Linking Words

, the

lonelyness

Correct your spelling

loneliness

that

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

these

show examples

youngsters experience daily is

other

Change the wording

another

show examples

factor which

lead

Change the verb form

leads

show examples

them to become less interactive as they

are

Change to the active voice

trully become

have trully become

show examples

trully

Correct your spelling

truly

become more

introvert

Replace the word

introverted

show examples

. In conclusion, facing the competitive world by

Change the form of the verb

going

show examples

out for

working

Replace the word

work

show examples

is not always a bad

things

Correct the article-noun agreement

thing

show examples

as it will benefit for fulfilling their educational and personal needs.

Although

Linking Words

lack

Correct article usage

the lack

show examples

Use synonyms

support

Change preposition

of support

show examples

caused by the

Use synonyms

parents

Change to a genitive case

parent's

parents'

show examples

absence will lead to

disturd

Correct your spelling

disturb

disturbed

children

Change noun form

children's

show examples

character

buildings

Fix the agreement mistake

building

show examples

, it will

also

Linking Words

guide them to be more independent

for

Change preposition

show examples

managing their daily.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Tue Aug 22 2023

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

280 words

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Your opinion

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In some countries, many more people are choosing to live alone nowadays than in the past. Do you think this is a positive or negative?

These days many people leave their country to work abroad and take their family with them. Do you think benefits of this outweigh disadvantages in terms of family development?