IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2020 with additional predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2020 with additional predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
This
Linking Words
 graph shows the data on the population
rate
Use synonyms
 in four different Asian countries (Philipines, Malaysia, Thailand, and Indonesia) in five different
decades
Use synonyms
 (1970-2020).
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it gives the prediction for living
people
Use synonyms
 in there for the next two
decades
Use synonyms
 (2030-2040).
Overall
Linking Words
, the number of living
people
Use synonyms
 in both Indonesia and Malaysia countries increased dramatically,
however
Linking Words
, the percentage of Philippines and Thailand populations show some fluctuations. From the graph,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the percentage of the population in Malaysia is doubled within the
last
Linking Words
 three
decades
Use synonyms
 (1970-2020).
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it was predicted to be grown around 10% from 2020-2040.
Similarly
Linking Words
, the percentage
rate
Use synonyms
 of living
people
Use synonyms
 in Indonesia rapidly went up from 12%-60% during the year 1970-2020.
However
Linking Words
, the prediction
rate
Use synonyms
 for the next two
decades
Use synonyms
 will be steadily growing.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
rate
Use synonyms
 of living
people
Use synonyms
 in the Philippines
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
reduced during the year 1990-2010,
while
Linking Words
 it increased in the
last
Linking Words
 ten years (2020).
Further
Linking Words
, the prediction
rate
Use synonyms
 for the Philippines population will go up by 3%.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "furthermore, however, last".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words rate, decades, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: