The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zeeland in 2003 and 2013.

#show #sales #sectors #zeeland

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The given pie charts present the types of services in

online

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the online

an online

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shopping

center

Fix the agreement mistake

centers

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and

percentage

Correct article usage

the percentage

show examples

of customers in each section in New Zeeland in 2003 and 2013.

Overall

Linking Words

, travel and

clothe

Change the form of the verb

clothing

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sections have dropped,

while

Linking Words

mass media,

such

Linking Words

as films, music and book

sales

Use synonyms

showed

rise

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a rise

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. In 2003, travel occupied the biggest portion of

sales

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, just over

than

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apply

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the

Correct article usage

show examples

third of total

sales

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. Clothe and films/music section has approximately the same draws, 24 and 21

percent

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per cent

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respectively. The less popular sort of product

was books

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was booked

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with 19%. In 2013, there was

not

Correct your spelling

show examples

big change in proportions. Film and music become domain

type

Fix the agreement mistake

types

show examples

sales

Use synonyms

(33$).

Journey

Correct article usage

The journey

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section occupied 29% of all

sales

Use synonyms

. Books and clothes changed only marginally.

Submitted by sagynysh.mutigulliyeva.01 on Tue Aug 22 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Vocabulary: Replace the words sales with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.

▼

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

118 words

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The pie charts below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zeeland in 2003 and 2013.

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while other think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Dicss both view and give our opinion

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Modern children are suffering from the diseases that were once considered to only be meant for adults. Obesity is a major disease prevalent among children. What are its causes, and what solutions can be offered?

More and more students are choosing to study at colleges and universities in a foreign country. Do the advantages of studying abroad outweigh the drawbacks?