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Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.
#minutes #expenditure #three #categories #age #groups #residents #uk #summaries #information #features #comparisons
The given bar graph illustrates the five different age groups of UK
citizens's
Remove the s
citizens'
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 total
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
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on
Change preposition
in
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 three categories in 2004.
Overall
,
residents's
Remove the s
residents'
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 expense ratio
on
Change preposition
in
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 the culinary sector slightly increased,
however
, the percentage of expenditure on
the
Correct article usage
apply
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restaurant and hotel services followed a downward trend by
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
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. The group
of
Change preposition
apply
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Under 30
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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only spent 6% of total revenue on food and drink and
this
 ratio increased by 17% to approximately 23% in the Above-76-year-old class.
Moreover
, the outcome for entertainment facilities
also
 saw
Correct article usage
a noticable
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noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 upward trend by
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 and peaked at 23% in the 61-
75 year-old
Add a hyphen
75-year-old
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 group,
then
 experienced a drop by 10% in 2004. The remaining spending area was restaurant and hotel payments dropped
slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
 in the older generations. Before inclined by roughly 5% in the age of 76-plus group, hit the bottom at 2% in the 61-75 years old
citizens's
Change noun form
citizens
show examples
 category.
Submitted by historicalpen on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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