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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Is it wise for an industry to replace its experienced But old workers with new and young experience less Individuals? to what extent you agree or disagree

#industry #workers #individuals
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Many industries prefer to keep their elder but more experienced workers than young ones, And some focused on training less expert but fresh.
Therefore
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, I think after a proper time, everyone needs a rest, and they should be retired and replaced with a person who has more energy to put their effort into a task for improvements. In my side of view, I kind of agree about
this
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 topic, and I think Industries should give youngsters
this
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 chance to develop their abilities and become the next professional at work
initially
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.
although
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 the old worker has the right to be off duty, and spend the rest of their lives in peace and enjoy it much.
Therefore
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, frankly,
this
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 exchange not only advantages the individuals but
also
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 has a great impact on society by reducing the unemployment rate. So it caused that when a student graduates he/she will not feel the pressure of imposing.
Furthermore
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,
this
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 situation makes the potential student eager to concentrate on their studies and they will have confidence that there is enough job opportunity for them. In the opposite stage, recruitment for replacement, and
also
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 instruction of the new labour take much time, endeavour, money and etc. for companies.
Thus
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, a lot of them select to get as much as advantage they can obtain from their recent workforce. To some extent, it might be wiser to use employees who are more able to handle tasks and have more experience to deal with many problems that may be faced at work.
To sum up
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, in advance, it seems more intelligent to use a fresh and fond workforce. In some notions,
this
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 usage considers even society-friendly. In a way that could increase confidence, enthusiasm among the youth generation.
Moreover
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, the number of people who don't have a related job will have fallen.
Submitted by reihanetorfe on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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