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Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show ưhat UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008

The charts below show ưhat UK graduate and postgraduate students who did not go into full-time work did after leaving college in 2008
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The provided bar charts illustrate the
number
Use synonyms
 of UK
students
Use synonyms
 who did not go to a full-time job after their graduation and postgraduation in the year 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was the highest
number
Use synonyms
 of
students
Use synonyms
 who continued their educations after graduating.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, among graduate and postgraduate people who did work without any payment was the lowest
number
Use synonyms
. As far as the
number
Use synonyms
 of degree holders is concerned, 29665
students
Use synonyms
 continued their studies, which was the highest.
Moreover
Linking Words
, there were 16235 individuals who did not have a job after the degree. Among those, some people who worked did not have any salary, which was 3500. And, 17735 individuals did part-time jobs. When it comes to the postgraduate
students
Use synonyms
, 2725
students
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 continued
further
Linking Words
 studies. Unemployment and part-time workers were 1625 and 2535, respectively. Among those, 345
students
Use synonyms
 did voluntary work.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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