The table below shows the percentage of the population by age groups in one town who rode bicycles in 2011

#percentage #population #age #groups #town #bicycles

The given table portrays information regarding the percentage of cyclists in a particular area categorised by the

age

range of 2011. It is immediately noticeable that the number of women who rode

a bicycles

Correct the article-noun agreement

bicycles

a bicycle

show examples

had been dominated by all the

age

groups, which

is outrace

Wrong verb form

outraced

show examples

the opposite gender during the period.

Additionally

, their

age

between 20-

Correct word choice

and 39

show examples

experienced almost double in bicycle usage of men. A closer inspection of the trend illustrates that

Correct article usage

the 0

show examples

9 years old

Correct your spelling

9-year-old

population accounted for the majority

rode

Change preposition

of rode

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number of bycycles when compared to the other

age

groups for just over

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

half, which is similar among

female

Fix the agreement mistake

females

show examples

and

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

(52.5% and 51.2%).

On the other hand

, the lowest occupied by old adults

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

aged between 40-59 approximately 13.7% and 9.3% respectively.

Accordingly

Add a comma

,Accordingly

show examples

the second on the rank

were

Change the verb form

was

show examples

adolestcents

Correct your spelling

adolescents

aged 10-19, which

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

significantly

vary

Wrong verb form

varied

show examples

in the amount towards sex around 43.6% and 25.1%

succesively

Correct your spelling

successively

Futhermore

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

aged 20-39

also

had a huge gap

different

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

between

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The table below shows the percentage of the population by age groups in one town who rode bicycles in 2011

Today, many people don't know their neighbours in large city What problems does this cause what can be done about this

Some people encourage young children to leave their parents’ house as soon as they become adults while others say children should stay at their parents’ house as long as possible. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People are encouraged to get rid of things in order to get newest fashion and latest technologies. Do the disadvantages of throwaway society outweigh the economic advantages?

Some people believe that all wild animals should be protected. Others say that few wild animals should be protected instead. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

You recently made a journey by train. When you got on the train, you realised you had left a bag on the platform. Write a letter to the station manager. In your letter •give details of where and when you left the bag •describe the bag and its contents •suggest how you could get the bag back