IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The table shows the Proportions of Pupils Attending Four Secondary School Types Between 2000 and 2009.

The table shows the Proportions of Pupils Attending Four Secondary School Types Between 2000 and 2009.
#proportions #pupils #four #school
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given table indicates the percentages of students who enrolled at four different types of secondary school from 2000 to 2009. Taken as a whole, obviously, there was a downward trend seen in
specialist
Use synonyms
,
grammar
Use synonyms
 and voluntary-controlled
schools
Use synonyms
;
nevertheless
Linking Words
, the
last
Linking Words
 type of
Use synonyms
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
, community, experienced a remarkable increase, particularly peaking in the
year
Use synonyms
 2009.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, more than half of the students totalstudents’total enrolled in Voluntary-controlled
Schools
Use synonyms
 in 2000, the figure regarding community
schools
Use synonyms
 was just 12
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
, equal to that of
specialist
Use synonyms
schools
Use synonyms
. At the same
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
,
grammar
Use synonyms
schools
Use synonyms
 represented
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
just under one-four of the
students
Correct word choice
total students
show examples
totalstudents’total
Correct your spelling
total
 After five years, the proportion of learners attending community
schools
Use synonyms
 increased by 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 and surged well to well over 50
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in the
year
Use synonyms
 2009. An opposite trend could be observed in the case of voluntary-controlled
schools
Use synonyms
 as their figure dipped to 38
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in the
year
Use synonyms
 2005 and 20
Use synonyms
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 in 2009
Grammar
Use synonyms
Schools
Use synonyms
 and
Specialist
Use synonyms
Schools
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 saw declines in attendance but less noticeable. The percentage of learners in
grammar
Use synonyms
schools
Use synonyms
 dropped marginally from 24
percent
Use synonyms
 in 2000 to 19
percent
Use synonyms
 in the
year
Use synonyms
 2005 and period at 10
percentpercents
Correct your spelling
per cent
 in 2009, meanwhile,
specialist
Use synonyms
schools
Use synonyms
becamebecoming
Correct your spelling
became
 11
percent
Use synonyms
 in 2005 and
then
Linking Words
 exactly 10
percentpercents
Correct your spelling
per cent
 by the end of the given period.
Submitted by namle.ivce on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words specialist, grammar, schools, year, percent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: