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Band 5

Topic: Many students find it difficult to concentrate or pay attention at school. What are the reasons? What could be done to solve this problem?

#topic #students #attention #school
One
 of the widely discussed issues nowadays is the
troubles
Fix the agreement mistake
trouble
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to concentrate
Change preposition
of concentrating
show examples
 at school. It is undeniable that difficulties
to concentrate
Change preposition
in concentrating
show examples
 has become an essential part of our life.
However
, these days there are certain steps schools and universities can
do
Verb problem
take
show examples
 to improve
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
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concentration
.
One
 of the main aspects of the
problem
 is that
problem
Correct article usage
the problem
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 can keep
students
 from distracting themselves is in fact, the system
use
Change the form of the verb
used
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 to
tech
Correct your spelling
teach
show examples
 pupils.
One
 of the main reasons behind
that is
 the methods of teaching when a lot of
students
 just closed in
one
 cabinet
stared
Wrong verb form
staring
show examples
 at
one
 desk leaves no
spaces
Fix the agreement mistake
space
show examples
 for individualities.
This
 could lead to reducing the level of
concentration
 for the
students
 which is
also
 might result in the effectiveness of the teaching ways from the bad side. To tackle
this
problem
 people should build
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
schools with
the
Change the article
a
show examples
 large amount of space or
may
Verb problem
apply
show examples
provide
an online lectures
Correct the article-noun agreement
online lectures
an online lecture
show examples
 where pupils would be able to watch lessons as many times as needed with enough space.
This
 may be the least complex and so the best way to improve the effectiveness and increase the
students
'
concentration
. Having weighed everything mentioned
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, we can come to
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 conclusion that there are many options to solve the
problem
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
 decreasing the
concentration
 level
within
Change preposition
among
show examples
students
. So it would not be surprising to see some improvements in the near future. Actions must be taken urgently,
otherwise
Add a comma
,otherwise
show examples
 we will get an even worse situation with the
problem
 of decreasing the level of
concentration
 at school.
Submitted by dnm.best on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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