IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #information #features #comparisons
City
Correct article usage
The city
show examples
 hospital is located at Ring
Road
. In 2007 the
road
access
 was small and the
car
park
 for staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 was in the same area. Because of that, there was not much space for
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 to
park
 their
car
 there. If you wanted to go there by
bus
, there were 6
bus
 stops near the city hospital, but the
bus
 had to stop in the middle of the
road
, so it blocked the
car
access
 to the hospital. But in the past three years, the
access
 to the city hospital has improved so much. The staff
car
park
 and the public
car
park
 were separated, so there was more space for the public to
park
 their
car
. The staff
car
park
 was located on the south part
while
 the public
car
park
 was located on the east part. They
also
 added a bigger
bus
 station next to the
road
 so it won’t block the
car
access
 to the hospital. The
bus
 could go to the
bus
 station through the roundabout.
Submitted by twiggseducationbdg on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words road, access, car, park, bus with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • improvements
  • facilitate
  • congestion
  • junctions
  • streamline
  • traffic flow
  • reduce congestion
  • public transport
  • bus station
  • efficiency
  • accessibility
  • parking facilities
  • car park
  • designated
  • alleviate
  • issues
  • adequate space
  • enhancements
  • overall accessibility
  • traffic management
  • convenience
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