IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #information #features #comparisons
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City
Correct article usage
The city
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 hospital is located at Ring
Road
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. In 2007 the
road
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access
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 was small and the
car
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park
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 for staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
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 was in the same area. Because of that, there was not much space for
public
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the public
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 to
park
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 their
car
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 there. If you wanted to go there by
bus
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, there were 6
bus
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 stops near the city hospital, but the
bus
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 had to stop in the middle of the
road
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, so it blocked the
car
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access
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 to the hospital. But in the past three years, the
access
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 to the city hospital has improved so much. The staff
car
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park
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 and the public
car
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park
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 were separated, so there was more space for the public to
park
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 their
car
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. The staff
car
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park
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 was located on the south part
while
Linking Words
 the public
car
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park
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 was located on the east part. They
also
Linking Words
 added a bigger
bus
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 station next to the
road
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 so it won’t block the
car
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access
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 to the hospital. The
bus
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 could go to the
bus
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 station through the roundabout.
Submitted by twiggseducationbdg on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words road, access, car, park, bus with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • improvements
  • facilitate
  • congestion
  • junctions
  • streamline
  • traffic flow
  • reduce congestion
  • public transport
  • bus station
  • efficiency
  • accessibility
  • parking facilities
  • car park
  • designated
  • alleviate
  • issues
  • adequate space
  • enhancements
  • overall accessibility
  • traffic management
  • convenience
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