Obesity is now a major global epidemic. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?

#obesity #epidemic

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Obesity is

one

Use synonyms

of the health

Use synonyms

problem

Change to a plural noun

problems

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that massively increased recently

due to

Linking Words

some

caused

Replace the word

causes

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that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Wrong verb form

relate

show examples

Use synonyms

Change preposition

to people

show examples

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

habit

Fix the agreement mistake

habits

show examples

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

. Even

Linking Words

this

Correct word choice

though this

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has been

worldwide

Correct article usage

a worldwide

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epidemic

problem

Use synonyms

however

Linking Words

, it still could be done through some actions and the elaboration to solve

this

Linking Words

matter will be covered in

this

Linking Words

essay.

Firstly

Linking Words

one

Use synonyms

Add an article

the reason

show examples

reason

Fix the agreement mistake

reasons

show examples

people

Use synonyms

could get over-weight is

they

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

lack of activities and it

highly

Add a missing verb

is highly

show examples

possible

happen

Fix the infinitive

to happen

show examples

people

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who work in the office and seldom

Fix the infinitive

apply

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do a workout.

Secondly

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, it could happen because of their bad habit,

for instance

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late night

Add a hyphen

late-night

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dinner

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dinners

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Hence

Linking Words

, these circumstances are the main reasons for

people

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get

Verb problem

become

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obesity

Replace the word

obese

show examples

. Meanwhile, there

are

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show examples

some research that

prove

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proves

show examples

this

Linking Words

problem

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

hereditary, and

this

Linking Words

remains be more complicated to tackle

this

Linking Words

problem

Use synonyms

. Even if

this

Linking Words

challenge could

be happen

Change the verb form

happen

show examples

towards every

Use synonyms

people

Fix the agreement mistake

person

show examples

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

there are some practices or solutions to tackle

this

Linking Words

One

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of which is

people

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have to be active. Active refers to how often and how long a person

Change the verb form

does

show examples

walking. Research

said

Wrong verb form

says

show examples

people

Use synonyms

have to walk at least 1,000 steps in a day.

Moreover

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

have to do exercise 2 times

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a week.

This

Linking Words

activity could

generates

Change the verb form

generate

show examples

body flexibility

as well as

Linking Words

enhances

Correct subject-verb agreement

enhance

show examples

Use synonyms

people

Change noun form

people's

show examples

cardio. In spite of these,

people

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

have to control their food, because some of them

are consist

Change the verb form

consist

show examples

of a lot of sugar,

carbo

Correct your spelling

carbs

show examples

, and

also

Linking Words

junk food.

To conclude

Linking Words

, obesity is

one

Use synonyms

epidemic

Correct article usage

the epidemic

show examples

health

Use synonyms

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

global

Change the word

globally

show examples

, and it could be worse

Change preposition

for

show examples

the body if

people

Use synonyms

ignore

this

Linking Words

However

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

is still

cureable

Correct your spelling

curable

and preventable as long as

people

Use synonyms

keep their good

habit

Fix the agreement mistake

habits

show examples

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Sat Aug 26 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Provide a clear introduction and conclusion in your essay.

coherence cohesion

Support your main ideas with relevant examples and explanations.

task achievement

Provide a more comprehensive response by discussing multiple solutions to tackle obesity.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to improve your lexical resource and grammatical range and accuracy.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
40
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

269 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

epidemic
balanced diet
nutritional labeling
public recreational spaces
community sports programs
food advertising regulations
medical professionals
workplace wellness programs
mental health support
sugary drinks tax
consumer choices
affordable and accessible
health organizations

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Obesity is now a major global epidemic. What can be done to tackle this increasingly common problem?

Computers and AI technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artifical intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?

Many small local shops are closing as they are unable to compete with large supermarkets in the area.How does this effect local communities? How could this situation be improved?

It is the responsibility of schools to teach children good behaviour in addition to provide formal education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Children today are told dependent on computer and electronic entertainment.It would be better to encourage them to spend more time outside playing sports and games. Do you agree or disagree.