The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
been shut down. In 2011, there
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
8.500 new
shops
that
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
just newly introduced. Moving to 2012,
stores
that are just open in the area drastically lower compared
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2011, around 4.000
stores
. In 2013, in difference of 1.000 new
shops
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
introduced, making it 5.000
shops
in that
year
. Moving forward to 2014, around 6.001 are making their grand opening in the country.
Thus
increases the
number
of new
shops
compared to 2014. Reaching the
year
2015, there
are
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
slightly a decreasing
number
of new
stores
for about
4.000
Correct your spelling
4,000
stores
in the area.
This
goes on until the
year
2017. In 2018, there are a less
number
of
stores
that are
Verb problem
apply
show examples
opening, around 3.000 in that
year
.
However
, there are
also
shops
that are closing in between these new opening
shops
. In 2011, the
number
or
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
stores
that are closed
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
around 6.002. It
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
2
shops
,
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
it 6.000
stores
that
close
Wrong verb form
closed
show examples
down in the following
year
which is 2012. Moving to 2013, there are a slightly
number
of 7.001
shops
that
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
shut down.
Comparing
Wrong verb form
Compared
show examples
to 2011, there is only 1 different
number
of
stores
that are closed down in 2014, which make it 6.001
shops
. In 2015
however
,
there’re
Wrong verb form
there were
show examples
only around 9.000
stores
that
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
closed
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
from
Change preposition
to
show examples
2011 until 2018. It going up again to the
number
of 5.001
shops
that
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
closed in 2016. In 2017,
there’re
Wrong verb form
there was
show examples
a
slightly
Change the word
slight
show examples
1
number
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
difference
Fix the agreement mistake
differences
show examples
from 2016
shops
that
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
closed in 2017.
Then
in 2018, it
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
6.001
shops
that
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
closed down same as the
number
of
shops
that
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
shut down in 2016.
This
conclude
Change the verb form
concludes
show examples
that there’s a bigger
number
of
stores
that closed in the
year
of 2011 until 2018 compared to the
number
of
shops
that are just opened
Submitted by lydiaia on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Contractions: Don't use contractions.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words shops, stores, year, number with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "difference" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 9 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 5 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • retail landscape
  • net growth
  • market dynamics
  • economic indicators
  • fluctuations
  • pivotal
  • consumption patterns
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar
  • downward/upward trend
  • stabilize
  • recession
  • boom
  • retail sector
  • closure rate
  • inauguration/opening rate
  • consumer market
  • saturate
  • commercial viability
  • profitability
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