In many countries, the level of crime is increasing and crimes are becoming more violent. Why do you think is and what can be done about it?
Crime
has been a major problem in today's world, with crime
rates increasing every year, as well as
the violent actions that take place while
committing an offense
to the public. There has been countless debates and action on how to minimize the Change the spelling
offence
crime
rates, however
so far those didn’t
Verb problem
haven’t
work
so well. I myself would despise when someone commits a felony and in Wrong verb form
worked
this
written essay, I will share my opinion on how to minimize crime
rates.
To start off with, I believe that the majority of perpetrators come with three elements that are either from poor family households, low education
, and outcast people
. As time goes by, countries all around the world will develop, which could be that more people
are required to work more, they are demanded more from society
which people
who come from poor families will most likely not be able to survive in the modern era. This
will lead them to do anything for them to survive which comes at a high cost. As well as
people
who are uneducated, since society
is evolving and developing, society
needs highly educated people
which leads more schools to be constructed, however
those who come from a poor family won't be able to afford an education
, and without proper education
, with no skills or knowledge
they are not needed. Add a comma
,knowledge
Lastly
, the people
who aren’t performing good
enough, their skills and knowledge get Change the word
well
out performed
by others leads them to be Correct your spelling
outperformed
outcast
, Fix the agreement mistake
outcasts
which
they will do anything for attention whether it can be doing stupid things, or committing crimes.
Correct word choice
and
Although
,
there have been countless attempts to Remove the comma
apply
lower
these situations from happening, I believe there should be more to be implemented. One idea that instantly pops up in my head is reducing the price Verb problem
prevent
for
Change preposition
of
an
Remove the article
apply
education
, by reducing the price more families will be able to afford such
education
, however
there Add a comma
,however
has
been countless debates where many Change the verb form
have
people
debate that education
should be free. I can somehow relate to this
idea, however
, as a business student school is also
a business just as any other businesses
, with Fix the agreement mistake
business
education
being free they will not last
. Since performing is very important in today's society
, yet some people
just couldn't
keep up, Wrong verb form
can't
therefor
an idea which Rephrase
apply
come
to mind Change the verb form
comes
that
governments should make a system where those who can't perform well in their field, Add a missing verb
is that
they
can switch their industry or field, have a tryout for one-month maximum to see whether they perform well and if they do, they will be hired. Correct pronoun usage
apply
People
's mental health has been getting worse ever since the 21st century, especially the outcast people
. There is no clear or precise action to help with this
rather than therapy,
since therapy is very expensive. What the government can do is to make therapy free for a month, Remove the comma
apply
this
can reduce a person's level of stress and anxiety by a margin. The simplest way and easiest is that
the government can enforce the law more strictly than before.
Correct word choice
for
To conclude
my writing, there is no perfect plan for anything, we are living in a competitive world which has been ever since humans were brought to earth. As for myself, I believe those are just excuses to do such
things.Submitted by jakelong16091994 on
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Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.