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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organisation. Do the advantages for people working for their own business outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #business #company #organisation
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In recent years,there has been a noticeable trend in starting a
business
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. The reason is
independence
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 and flexibility, suitable for the amount of people who seek novelty and self-command at work. And it is
also
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 the
independence
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 that brings a lot of challenges. From my point of view, the disadvantages of owning a
business
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 do outweigh the advantages. Admittedly, starting a
business
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 has some benefits. The first advantage is flexibility,
business
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 owners have
authority
Correct article usage
the authority
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 to choose products, services and prices and the most important is to decide the working schedule
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 is suitable for
self
Correct pronoun usage
them
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. The second advantage is financial
independence
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, the owners can earn more money because
business
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 owners do not depend on the managers and are fully in charge of finances.
However
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, I believe that working for an organisation would bring entrepreneurs more detriment. Typically it is difficult to maintain and expand
due to
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lack
Correct article usage
a lack
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 of partners, partners and money are the two most important factors for starting a
business
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, it determines 90
percent
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per cent
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 of
business
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 growth.
Not to mention
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 lack of resources and experience, two factors are important only after partners and money. Lack of experience will cause businesses to face many difficulties and easily fail. In summary,
while
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 starting a
business
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 is
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independence
Replace the word
independent
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 and
flexibility
Replace the word
flexible
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, it still has a lot of challenges and risks. So, to start a
business
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 is not easy, carefully in all of the choices dedication is indispensable.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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