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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the top ten countries for the production and consumption of electricity in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart shows the top 10 countries for
electricity
Use synonyms
production
Use synonyms
 and consumption in 2014. China is the leading producer and consumer of
electricity
Use synonyms
, followed by the United States, Russia, and Japan. Canada, France, Brazil, Germany, and South Korea have similar levels of
production
Use synonyms
 and consumption.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, we observe the countries are ranked
according to
Linking Words
 their
electricity
Use synonyms
 usage. On number 1, we have China with the highest amount of
electricity
Use synonyms
 being utilized (5,322
billion
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kWh
Use synonyms
)
as well as
Linking Words
 made (5,398
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
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).
However
Linking Words
, on
second
Correct article usage
the second
show examples
 number we see
United
Correct article usage
the United
show examples
 States, producing 4099
billion
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kWh
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
electricity
Change preposition
of electricity
show examples
 and at the same time consuming 3866
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
Use synonyms
 of it. Afterwards, Russia and Japan are on 3rd and 4th and are using an average of 900
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
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 and are making almost 1000
billion
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kWh
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Canada and France are showing a similar pattern. In both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
places,
electricity
Use synonyms
production
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 is near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
600,
whereas
Linking Words
production
Use synonyms
 is
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
500. We find Brazil, Germany and
Korean
Correct your spelling
Korea
show examples
, Rep on the bottom
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ranking number 8th, 9th and 10th respectively. The three of them combined are consuming and producing a total of nearly 1500
billion
Use synonyms
kWh
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light
Change preposition
of light
show examples
.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 86%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity, production, billion, kwh with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • electricity production
  • electricity consumption
  • disparity
  • significant
  • top ten countries
  • main features
  • compare
  • relevant
  • geographical concentration
  • trends
  • patterns
  • implications
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