The charts below show the percentages of male and female students getting top grades in 1960 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#show #percentages #students #grades #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The bar charts illustrate the proportions of students from both genders that excelled in five subjects over the period

Change preposition

between

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1960 and 2000.

Overall

Linking Words

Males

Use synonyms

were better at

Science

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Math

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and

Humanities

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while

Linking Words

females

Use synonyms

obtained higher grades in

Arts

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and

Languages

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To begin

Linking Words

with, in 1960,

males

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surpassed

females

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Science

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and

Math

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with nearly 33% and 30% of male students that scored high grades compared to 10% and 4% of the

females

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In contrast

Linking Words

Females

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excelled in

Arts

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Languages

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and

Humanities

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with nearly 30%, 45% and 32%

scored

Wrong verb form

scoring

show examples

excellent grades respectively.

While

Linking Words

the percentage of

males

Use synonyms

that got good scores in those subjects

were

Correct subject-verb agreement

was

show examples

9% in

Arts

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, 21% in

Languages

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and 23% in

Humanities

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, in 2000, there was a slight decrease in the percentage of

males

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that excelled in

Science

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, by 10% and by 12% in

Math

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, despite that,

males

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remained in the lead. There was a small increase in

Arts

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to about (21%)

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apply

show examples

and a significant increase in

Humanities

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to 42%. As for the

females

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, the proportion that obtained top degrees in

Science

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and

Math

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remained nearly the same. There was a slight decrease in by 5 % in

Arts

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and by 10% in

Languages

Use synonyms

and

Humanities

Use synonyms

Submitted by islam_biologist on Thu Aug 31 2023

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Vocabulary: Replace the words males, science, math, humanities, females, arts, languages with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "remained" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

203 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

percentages
top grades
achievement
gender disparity
educational trends
academic performance
comparison
decade
educational policy
societal expectations
improvement
educational attainment
graduates
academic excellence
statistics
educational landscape
benchmark
parity
gender roles
historical data
performance indicators
educational improvements
longitudinal study
scholastic achievement
gender gap

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The charts below show the percentages of male and female students getting top grades in 1960 and 2000. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Some people think the government should invest more money in teaching science than other subjects in order for a country to develop and progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the only reason for learning language is in order to travel ro or work in a foreign country. Others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn a foreign language. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that an international car-free day is an effective way to reduce air pollution. Others think there are more effective ways to do this. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

It is inevitable that traditional cultures will be lost as technology develops. Technology and traditional cultures are incompatible.

Please elaborate on your current physical and mental health, including any dental or oral treatment, medical interventions, and mental health therapy or counseling.